The Birth of Zoe Mae
Being told at 16 years old that having children would be a challenging thing and would most likely need a lot of medical assistance was very hard to comprehend for a girl that dreamt of being a mother, teacher, and lover of children. Fast forward 14 years; after being married a mere 8 months, never having lived with each other and in reality still understanding what living with another person (especially of the opposite sex) was like we found out that we were pregnant! Shocked! It was a possibility I guess, coming off of the birth control to prepare for possible treatments within the next 6 months but thinking that pregnancy was still over a year or so away. The pregnancy was horrible, getting sick all day every day up to the day having the baby. Knowing natural labor was not a possibility due to fear of needles, blood, and in general anything that has to do with a doctor's office! Having it scheduled for March 23rd, there was a pain the day prior that became so unbearable. Being told it was probably just gas pains and to use the restroom; fighting the pain for over 12 hours I finally gave in and went to The Birthing Inn. After being hooked up to every machine I was told that the contractions were only 2 minutes apart. Was this baby coming now? I had no clue! I thought to myself, "how can this be I'm suppose to have the baby tomorrow with the scheduled C-Section". After freaking out, literally freaking out, they finally gave me the epidural and anesthesia then our precious Baby Zoe was born. Now when I woke up from the anesthesia, I still had no clue that the surgery actually happened. Man did I feel silly when I began to beg and beg to be put out for the C-Section! Reality checks come quick when they're from annoyed nurses. When I met Zoe Mae for the first time I then understood what every other mother meant when they said "you'll never understand life until you have a child". All of a sudden nothing else mattered; just simply making her happy. What I remember most about the birth of our daughter was the major amount of support from my Mom (who was there when I went to the hospital and very excited for her 23rd grandchild!), our Pastors of our church were there for the majority of the delivery (thank goodness I was put out because I'm REALLY not a showcase kind of person!), my husband's parents came into town for the delivery to support the birth of their second grandchild, and the staff and parents of the facility I was employed at (with their overwhelming support and love shown through gifts, encouraging words, and visits to the hospital). It was the support that got me through everything! I wasn't the first time parent that was scared when we brought her home, I was more excited that I could finally get out of the hospital after 4 days and start real life back again. Zoe brought a lot of love, excitement, and joyto our lives that I didn't know was missing. The love and support from all of our family members was overjoying and really made my husband and I know that no matter what, if we knew the answers or not, we knew we have the support to get through it all. I chose this experience because its something personal and a great major part of who I am now. We each have life experiences that have brought us to our standpoints and the person we are today. Having Zoe has changed a lot of things for me, and even though her pregnancy was a surprise for us. It has been a surprise that has changed our lives for the better! After having Zoe, I have a lot of respect for women who go through natural birth! I am a very strong person, but medical things . . . that's a whole new story! I believe that the actual birth of a child is important along the lines of the medical attention able to be given to the families. In regards to child development; the amount of support and attention given to the child after the birth is as just as important. I know when complications arise then the level of medical attention becomes more pertinent to the child's development. In the US these levels of assistance are easily offered as well as accepted (in most circumstances). The number of government and privately funded programs available both assist parents and guardians in the procedures for help as well as follow up from the many levels of support.
Zambia, Africa
Having traveled to Africa on a few occasions, there were many areas of life that I was exposed to. While in Zambia I had the opportunity to work with women of a local tribe and some women that traveled by foot for days to attend this educational training. Not only are these women victims of rape, incest, and one wife of many to their husband but their understanding of medical attention was in evident. After use of a great translator I began to understand that if a woman began labor she had the opportunity to either give birth in their personal home or walk (at times several kilometers) to a mud home where other women from their tribe would assist. These women that would assist them were not trained professionals (although called themselves birthing assistants they were more the most experienced in the tribal rituals of birth), rather women that heard the noises and screams of labor without epidurals and other medications, If a problem occurred during child birth; medical practices were not looked to instead witchcraft was and blamed inappropriate behavior on the problem. Women would usually need to confess their behavioral faults in belief that would solve the problem. If the problem continued or child is born with a disability then the mother was blamed for her misbehavior and child being cursed. If a child is born with an informality or disability the child and mother are usually outcast and experience a very hard battle for life. (There are areas of each country I have visited that medical attention is far greater than what was offered in this region; as in all countries). While speaking with these women it became a realization that I could NEVER give birth in this manner that they have! Not only do I adore the country I am from but after speaking with these women, I dread EVER giving birth in a manner or facilities (or lack thereof) as these women are forced to. Proper medical attention, medications for assistance, knowledgeable assistance, and acceptance with aide if a problem arises is well taken advantage of here in the States.
